# 87 Blazing Saddles, and It Shouldn't Be This Close

One recent survey indicated that up to 14% of the registered electorate who have not yet voted are still "Persuadeables," i.e., haven't really made up their minds. What in the Blazing Saddles are they waiting for? The election is on Tuesday, and it shouldn't be this close.

The survey also pointed out that 40% of the "Persuadeables," or Undecideds, are leaning toward Obama, 40% are leaning toward McCain, and 20% couldn't find their @$$#$ with both hands and a plunger. The survey did say that. Really. Well, almost.

One Undecided person who was quoted said that neither candidate "knows what it's like to be poor," to have to struggle. EXCUSE ME! Let's see -- which one of the candidates didn't have a father at home while he was growing up, had a mother die of cancer early in his life, was raised by a grandmother who gave up things she needed so that he could go to school?

Where in the Blazing Saddles has the schmuck who made that comment been for the last, oh, twenty-one months? Pardon me: is my impatience at what has to be intentional stupidity showing?

In fact, the surveys conducted do show that, on average, the current Undecideds (or Persuadeables) have less education and are less politically inquisitive than the rest of us. And, the surveys add, they are also less likely to vote, since (a) they are less interested in politics, and (b) they don't know what in the Blazing Saddles they're doing and are less likely to find the polls anyway. Even with both hands and a plunger.

All the polls I can find show Obama ahead in Pennsylvania beyond the margin of error, yet apparently TV stations are calling that state "a dead heat." How in the Blazing Saddles can that be? It shouldn't even be as close in Pennsylvania as Mason-Dixon's poll's four point difference; CNN has it still at twelve points. Either CNN hasn't updated its poll in two days, or I don't know why some networks are calling it "too close to call." Two polls show Obama ahead by seven and four points respectively in Ohio, by four and six points respectively in North Carolina, and by four points each in Viriginia. None of these results is within the margin of error, so where's the tightening coming from?

Frankly, it shouldn't even be close. If you will allow me to use some technical political jargon to explain why: the current administration's policies in economics, education, energy, environment, and foreign policy suck; everyone's retirement and other investments currently suck; John McCain is a petulant, angry, erratic, forgetful candidate whose characteristics and judgments in his first major decision--choosing a vice presidential running mate--suck.

That "giant sucking sound" you hear this election does not come from NAFTA, as Ross Perot was wont to say twelve years ago. This year, it's the Republican party's policies, and there is no Blazing Saddles reason they should still be in this presidential race. Even the issue of Race itself shouldn't be an issue any more: people have begun to discuss it more openly, and to express it during polling. So the polls (one would hope) probably do take the issue of Race increasingly into account. And maybe that's why there appears to be some narrowing of margins in individual states.

Well, we have another four days before we find out the results. I'm ready for this to be over. But only if Obama wins.

-- triton --